Turtle Man...

Have you ever met a crazy person??? No, not like a PMSing chick kinda crazy. I'm talkin like real crazy; like crazy crazy! I have! Last night! On my property! Ok let me esplain...

So like a month ago, the dumb dog started barking at like 1AM and I heard the gate at my driveway open and a car drive in and stop. So I got up and looked out my window and saw a guy going over to the gate to close it behind himself. Fishy right??? So I passed the time until I fell asleep again being irritated and plotting the downfall of the other people with whom I have to share my property.

The next morning around 10AM the guy left, and I called my Grandpa (who is my landlord) and told him how irked I was at the other tenants on the property who don't actaully live here. I said I thought they need to have hours when they shouldn't be allowed to come down here cause they wake me up and have little respect for us. I told him that there is no reason on earth for any of them to be here at 1AM. That got his attention and he said he wished I had called him and told him about it. I was like "Well, I'm not really accustomed to calling people at 1AM but if that's what you want..."

A couple nights later he came at midnight, so I called Grandad. He went out to the guy and talked to him and felt bad for him and decided he could stay. I didn't like it and told him so but he was trying to be kind and help the poor guy out. He told me he was odd but seemed harmless enough but if anything happened to let him know or call the cops if needed. Once again, he left the next morning at around 10. The same pattern continued since then. He would come quietly in the late evening and always close the gate behind himself and leave the next mid-morning. I didn't like it but there was nothing I could do but say I was uncomfortable and dream of the day we finally met face to face and hope that afterwards I could have a reason to make him go and stay away.

Tonight I got my wish! Yay!-ish... Today I had a nice girls day with my good friend Ciera. We ate sushi and watched the Princess and the Frog. After the movie we chatted and then she left. Or she tried to anyways... She called me from my driveway saying there was a guy asking for us to unlock the gate (there's a shiny new deadbolt on it as of two days ago) and demanding to be let in. I went out and he tried to give me the impression that he just needed to pick up some stuff and he was gonna leave. I let him know that I knew what he was doing here and that I wasn't thrilled with the situation. After the truth was out he kinda lost some steam but restarted his story.

Then he let me know he was crazier than his first impression made him seem. Turns out crazy people can pass as normal for a few minutes at a time. He began to tell me that he was a good christian man and that he didn't have a home and was going through "trials and tribulations" and that once he sold his [nasty crappy red] cadillac that the Lord would provide him with an RV and he would have a home. He started making Ciera nervous so she came over and asked for his name. His response: "My name is, uh, ........................Chris, some people call me Hovah [yeah, like Jehovah? Riiiiight!] or Turtle Man." Turtle Man? Wha? This is when we realized he was maybe not all there.

I'm thinking "whatever, I need to get out of this situation" and opened the gate and told him he could go get his stuff and reiterated that I preferred him to sleep elsewhere. He got defensive at this point as if I had told him flat out to get lost and the "conversation" escalated as he continued to tell us how he was a good Christian and that everyone was against him except for the angels and God and that someday he would be blessed for being so faithful. He said "The words of Jesus roll through me and out of my mouth." At this point, I'm a little more than freaked and I figure I have more than enough grounds to get Grandad to make him leave. So I told him "Go get your crap," and took Ciera back inside and called Grandad.

Grandad called the tenants on the property that had initially told him he could stay here and they came to talk to him and to try to get him to leave. Wanna hear the irony??? Turtle Man called the cops on all of us! That was just the proof to add to the pile of crazy I had just gotten. He's trespassing on our property and called the cops because we were "harassing" him!

When I saw the flashing lights out my kitchen window, my first thought was that there had been some kind of violence and someone got hurt and I was like "Oh, crap!" But once me and Ciera got outside it was difficult to refrain from the giggles. It was almost too obvious to the police who was the crazy and who belonged here. We told our side of the story and got the rest of the blanks for us filled. One of the cops walked up to us laughing really hard and told us the guy had a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle costume in his car and asked if we had ever seen him wearing it.  I guess that's how he got the name "Turtle Man".

All in all, it was a really fantastic day for me. I got new shoes (post on those lovelies coming soon), sushi  and a fun movie with Ciera, and the bum off my property! I'm pretty happy, and feeling safer than I have in a month!

Want Vs Need

Preston and I were having this discussion earlier. I had a moment of wittiness and I liked it enough to share:

Preston: I need a second monitor for my new computer.
Amy: You NEED one? How 'bout you WANT one?
Preston: No I need it, because then I can have iTunes open on one screen and do other stuff on the other one. I'll get twice as much done.
Amy: No, you'll be twice as absent from the real world. You don't need it, you want it.
Preston: No, I need it.
Amy: You need your left leg. You want a second computer monitor.

Gardening, Preston's News, and (of course) Chloe!

This picture really has nothing to with the rest of my post but I thought it was too cute to be missed!

Me and my blackened thumb have once again tried our hand at gardening... So far success! I planted tomatoes, bell peppers, and spaghetti squash. The tomatoes and squash have come up and I'm still waiting for the bell peppers to sprout. I'm starting to wonder if I'm gonna need to go buy seeds or if the seeds I pulled out of the pepper I ate are even gonna grow. I used seeds from a tomato I ate and the same with the squash. It's been fun! I used some old butter tubs I saved as tupperware and drilled some holes in the bottom of them and used their lids as excess water catchers. If the bell peppers don't sprout soon I think I will try planting some strawberries next. They are lined up on my kitchen window seal for now until they are strong enough to survive outside (maybe) and while I attempt to teach Claire that my planter outside is not an appropriate place to dig. We're gonna try chicken wire first. Any other anti-digging-doggie tips? Please? This is my outdoor planter that Meredith and I tilled and pulled weeds out of one day last week: 

(there are holes all over in it again courtesy of my anti-plant pup Claire):

Here's my tomatoes as of this morning:

And these little beauties are my little spaghetti squashes!:

Chloe loves being outside, though I haven't ever let her out to play on the ground. I bring out her highchair and some toys so she doesn't eat the dirt. I don't quite trust her with that yet but I can tell she can't wait to run around outdoors! We'll try a park now that she can walk!

And now......... The big news you've been waiting for!!!

Preston got a promotion!!! (Cheering and applause loudly with much exuberance!) He was promoted to Head Technician/Manager! He also got a raise with the promotion and hints at another raise if he does well in his new position! We are so excited and proud! I know he will do well and continue to grow in his work. He loves his job and all of the new (and sometimes VERY interesting) people he gets to meet everyday! We are so grateful for our blessings and we can't wait to see where life takes us!

Chloe picked up walking like a fish learning to swim. She had the balance thing down perfect before we made her go for it. After a solid week she's walking like a pro! She doesn't even fall down! When she does, she's careful about it and makes sure she put her butt to the floor before she goes face first! She's been picking up speed too and now when she's after something (like dog food) and we're hot on her tail she does this funny little laugh and tries to go faster. Here's a video of her perfected walking and that little laugh she does (try to ignore the mess, my face and gross hair, the laundry in the background and of course the mess): 

Chloe can WALK!!!

Last night before we all went to bed (it was kinda late) we were practicing with her by passing her back and forth between us because we knew she could do it if she actually tried. All of a sudden she took off while I was filming her! I couldn't believe it when she abruptly turned around and went the other way!!! That was the moment it became official. Between me and Preston was practice but striking out on her own was for real! The noise at the end is me crying and wouldn't you? I just watched my baby girl grow! My baby just became a toddler!!!

Catching up... Part 2

On the 2nd... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! I turned 24! One more year and I'll be a quarter of a century! Eww... The night before we had a little party with Preston's parents. It was mostly cake... mmmm, carrot cake.... But between Christmas and my birthday they gave me about half the money I needed to get a new camera. (More about the camera later) The day of we just kinda hung out and relaxed. It was oddly nice. Sometime in the mid afternoon we went over to my Aunt Therese's house for a game day she was having. We played Quelf. If you haven't played this game before you have to! And when you do don't be a bum and whimp out on following the instructions given. Just do it! I have never had so much fun playing a board game before! By the end of it my hair was a wreck and my muscles were sore from laughing so hard. Needless to say it's now my FAVORITE game! I need my own now!

     A few days later Preston's friend Matt came to town for a wedding. We had talked to him and worked out that we were going to buy his old SLR camera from him. My current plan is to go into photography. I've been practicing a lot with my little Kodak but it can only do so much. This thing is AWESOME! I've been working with Photoshop a lot too (mostly teaching myself how to use it). I can't wait to get started! Let me know if you want me to practice on you and you'll probably come out of it with some free pictures. I hoping that by the end of the year I'll feel confident enough with my work to start a business. The camera is a digital SLR Rebel XT. I LOVE it!
     This year we finally got a later time for church. It was at 8AM when we moved in when I was pregnant, and they kept the 8AM over through the next year. In December they announced that we were moving to 1PM church. I would have preferred like 10 or 11 but hey sleeping in is good too! Yay! On our second Sunday the whole stake had a great big meeting in the evening. Dun-da-dun! They tell us that they are rearranging all of the ward boundaries and adding a new ward to the stake! So we went and ... THEY CHOPPED OUR WARD IN HALF!!! They added a little of another ward to ours and gave us a new name. We were the Lindsay Ward in the Hermosa Vista Stake before and now we are the Lehi Crossing Ward. I like it. It feels right, ya know? It was sad to know I won't be seeing so many of the people I had finally gotten to know every Sunday, but now I get to meet a bunch of new ones! The 3rd Sunday of the year we attended our new ward for the first time and finally got to really see who we knew and didn't know. Guess what time it started? Nope, 8:30! We moved a whole half an hour later.... woo.... woo.... Here's the strange and magical part: Preston only needed an extra half an hour to sleep and then get ready for church so we were actually on time! Amazing! (Let the rolling of the eyes commence.)
     And my final topic in my whole catch up series... Drumroll please.... I'm on a new diet! *cricket, cricket*......... Yeah, yeah I know. Hear me out, k? I started this thing on the 12th. Today is 27th. That's 15 days. I have lost 18 pounds!!! Oh. Yeah. Don't freak out, it's safe, I checked. It's called the hCG Diet. The original protocol was developed in the 50's by a Dr. Simeons. He wrote a pamphlet/small book called Pounds and Inches (click for the original protocol) that explains in detail what it is and how it works. The terminology and science are outdated but the method is sound and works very well. It has sort of evolved since then too making it a lot easier for an average person to use it. HCG is the hormone that at home pregnancy tests read. I've been taking drops of the hormone and have adjusted my diet to fake out my body to think I am pregnant. In a pregnant woman hCG makes her stored fat available as nutrients for the baby. This is why a baby can survive the first three months of pregnancy when many women can barely keep anything in their stomachs. I have been eating a very strict and semi-complicated diet of 500 calories a day. I feel great! The hormone acts as a appetite suppressant so I haven't felt as hungry as I thought I might. I've been living off my own stored fat instead. One of the big differences between this and other diets is on a regular diet your structural fat generally goes first and people tend to look drawn and haggard. With hCG your structural fat is untouched. One of the really cool parts of it is that it's self restricting. You cannot lose more than what your DNA predetermined you should weigh. Everyone keeps asking about it so I've added a link for the original protocol. If you want more let me know and I can send you an e-mail with everything.

This is the picture hanging on my fridge giving me inspiration to not eat what I can't have. I'm like 13-14 in this picture. I'm aiming to have that waistline again!
     Wow I didn't mean for that to turn into some kind of sales pitch, it's just that when you tell someone hey I'm taking a hormone, eating only 500 calories, and losing weight ridiculously fast they tend to worry about your mental health. Soon there will be a before and after picture on here to show you my progress. Not right away because while I'm doing good, I still have a lot to go! But 18 pounds!?!? It's just falling off of me! Everyone can already see a difference and I am loving it! My plan is to do two 6 week rounds of the diet with the required 6 week maintenance phase in between and then... we will try for our second baby! This time I won't be a fat blob who through the first 6 months people wonder "Is she pregnant or fat?" Nope, I'm gonna be one of those cute ones with a baby bump! Oh yeah!
     Oh my goodness!!! Preston just called me (seriously just NOW) with the most fantastic news!!! It makes the 2 pounds I lost this morning sound like having chocolate ice cram compared to taking a vacation in Hawaii. I'm not allowed to announce it yet as it needs a lid on it for now in case certain people read my blog. But it's sooooo exciting!!! Don't worry I will tell you as soon as I'm allowed! How's that for a little suspense?

Catching up... Part 1

     I know it's nearly February but I haven't gotten the chance to tell you all about Christmas! It was a unique Christmas compared to all the others Preston and I have had since we got married.
     The weekend before Christmas itself, Preston, Chloe, the puppies and I all went to Heber to visit. It was one of the off years when not everyone can make it there to visit so we thought it would be fun to go by ourselves. It was nice to just take the dogs too instead of leaving them here with Preston's parents. For once I knew they wouldn't bug anyone (cept my dad and their evil cat Satan Savannah) and I knew they wouldn't get eaten by Moose (my brother Louis's monster sized dog aka: a mastiff). I got some long tie downs for the dogs to play outside without me having to worry about them. Course I did anyways cause it was so stinkin' cold up there. We really enjoyed ourselves relaxing and enjoying dad's cooking..... Mmmm.... Homemade Pizza!
     On our way back home from Heber we stopped in Payson for the Pitterle Family Christmas Party. There was lots of yummy mexican food (as is our usual tradition) and we played that white elephant gift exchange game everyone always plays (another tradition).

     (My uncle Brian and his son Mason-->)
We ended up with 2 games: Disney Scene It, and Banana Gram??? I guess it's like Scrabble, whatever. This time I knew to avoid the rum cake. (One year I had it thinking it was just my Grandma Mum's wonderful (edible) fruit cake, but was told afterwards that it was also soaked in rum, oops! Guess who had a low tolerance and got tipsy?)  
     Christmas started Christmas Eve for us (kinda on accident?). We decided to hang out with Preston's family that night because we were going to start our day at my mom's house two streets over. My mom called us and told us to come open presents because Selena and Josh couldn't wait any longer (spoiled brats goofballs). So we headed on over and opened presents till about 3AM. Chloe was STILL AWAKE! She loved all the toys Grandma Gaye got for her!

     The next morning afternoon we had our own little Christmas under our own tree. We dilly dallied around for a bit then got dressed, and went over to Preston's family. Once again, Chloe was showered in presents! A few hours later we went back to my mom's house for the Cheney Family Christmas Party. That was a lot of fun too. We played 20 questions with my cousins and ate yummy mashed potatoes and gravy! There was other food too but the highlight for me is always the spuds, so everything else is forgotten!

     The next day, we went to my sister Lori's house to have yet another Christmas party (The Pitterle/Hinchey Christmas Party)! There were more potatoes and gravy and Patty burned the green beans. No one was sad to see them go but she scraped off the burnt part and saved them. We exchanged presents and I got a cute new purse! It was so nice to see all my siblings again (I see them about once a year).
     Ok, this is getting long so I'm gonna stop here and start on another post. Hope you don't mind but we've had a lot going on!